Message to Moms from a non-mommy!

Agree? SuperAgree!!!! Real Moms will do whatever it takes to get it done for their kids!

My Mama will pampered us but scold us to the nth level just to make sure to get things straight. As a child, you'll have a love - hate relationship with your mom but eventually you'll realize that she will do whatever it takes to make sure you'll be in a perfect place.

I'm not yet a mommy but I love my pamangkins with all my heart. Some will say it's not the same but maybe the only difference is hindi ako yung nagdala sa kanila sa earth but the love? I can bet you all my fingers baka mas mahal ko pa sila.

1. Instinct - I know only mothers are supposed to have this, but when you love a person for so long. Kabisado mo na din when she's really happy or not. Sometimes, I woke up with a heavy heart and I'll open my phone and I have messages na, Kaya pala. Or sometimes, sasabihin nila ayaw nila ang isang bagay pero alam mo naman gusto talaga nila. Vice Versa. 

2. Unconditional Love - eto nobela post ( let's make it short) but kahit anong galit ko or sama ng loob ko. By the  end of the day, I still think of them and pray for them na ok sila. Kahit nasan pa sila. I will always pray that they're happy and healthy and most especially safe. Sometimes, we say things we don't mean sa sobrang pag mamahal natin for them but if hurtful yun sa kanila, Multiply it by a hundred sa pain we're feeling na hindi naman tayo ang mommy but our concern and love is nth level na. I cannot fathom the idea of not loving them..... minsan hindi ko na din maintindihan ang sarili. how can I love someone so much na hindi ko man lang anak? that i forgive them without saying sorry? siguro nga kasi unconditional love

3. Discipline - I will often hear this statement " madali pag hindi mo anak, pag ayaw mo na balik mo sa magulang" NOT TRUE. The hardest part of loving someone who's not your own kid is discipline. If you don't discipline them properly... people will say " e kasi hindi niya anak, kaya ok lang sa kanya ganyan yung bata" but if you scold them and grounded them " e kasi hindi niya anak, kaya mahigpit siya" or "hindi naman siya ang mommy, akala mo kung sino".  Damn you do, damn you don't. But if you really love someone, you will try your best to impart wisdom and goodness in them.

4. Loyalty - dahil nga hindi mo anak,  may loyalty yan sa parents, Kahit sayo pa nakatira yan and you spend 80% of your life with them. Loyalty to their parents with them. Expected mo na yan if you love someone na hindi mo anak. Yes, masakit kasi sa lowest points ikaw ang kasama pero sa happy moments hindi ikaw. Pero then again, due to unconditional love ok lang sayo. Ikaw pa magsasabi "don't forget your mom..." and ikaw pa ang magtatakip sa parents niya. 

5. GPS - people will say mommies are wired that way. Pero ako hindi mommy. GPS kung asan sila. Ah lunchtime na --- siguro nasa school canteen na yun, what is she eating kaya? sana hindi yung msg overload na french fries. 3pm - break niya sa office, i hope she's eating kasi maaga siya sa office kanina. baka pagod na yun. 5pm- tapos na kumon niya,I need to pick him up na (sabay takbo sa elevator). Pati sa bahay may GPS ka, GPS sa gamit nila. "Ninang, where's my shoes? the blue one, the brown one, the crocs one" and kailangan mo mahanap agad pa or else that little voice will turn to its highest volume until cranky levels. 

6. Selflessness - I grew up with a pampered childhood. But I made some sacrifices na even my closest friends wanted to kill me at some point. I won't go into details,but let's say until now pag naiisip ko yun. Hindi naman ako iyakin pero naiiyak ako in 10 seconds. Ibang level ng stupidity eto. Pero ganun talaga pag love mo kahit hindi mo pa anak. Kahit last money mo, ibibigay mo.

7. Dreams - all of us have our own dreams and goals. But mine (since I was 7 years old) kasama na sila, and even when I got married. I even incorporated my own husband sa dreams na yun. Dreams na I can support them all the way. I wished that we can travel together, and with my husband's generosity we were able to travel to 3 countries in 1 year. Whenever I remember their happy faces at the happiest place on earth, a big check sa bucket list ko.

8. Organizer, multi tasker - kahit grown ups na sila, you'll treat them sometimes like a 5 years old especially sa travels. Yung travel kit nila with the passports, itinerary, what to do when you get lost and their things to bring and snack bags same sa 5 years old! ang difference lang si 5 years old may whistle for crowded places, sila wala. And kailangan mo isipin yung needs nila before they actually need it. Foresee all the possibilities especially their needs and wants. A niece moved into a dorm para near sa school, walang ref sa room niya, I know hindi naman siya mahilig sa cold beverages but she likes snacks and with her school load. she needs all the comfort and support. A personal refrigerator, stocked with her favorite snacks, is a nice "start of the school year" gift. We got her blue para favorite color pa niya. Whenever we travel, I customized their travel kits. Pati sunblock and anti insect stickers, kasi yung isa may asthma ayaw niya ng scented. Yung isa sensitive ang skin so dapat ganitong sunblock. My mommy friends would always teased me minsan daw mas madami pa ko alam na kiddie products, research lang ng research :) 

9. Temper - I won't lie, may temper ako. Pero pagdating sa kids, wala. Kahit ibang kids, kasi iniisip ko na lang sana maging mabait din ang total strangers sa mga pamangkin ko. Example, a kid pushed a brimming pushcart sakin sa s&r, Susko, ang sakit nun, pero i smiled and told him "be careful next time ha" the mom was apologetic and super embarrassed pero iniisip ko if pamangkin ko yung kid, sana yung "victim" will still be nice and not shout at him/her.

10. Contentment - I'm a person who's rarely contented. But when I'm with them, there is a cloud of peace that enveloped me. I will always hope and pray they are in a good place kahit malayo pa sila. As long as they're in a good place ok na sakin yun. 

11. Counselor - I missed the mornings that when I woke up, i have messages from them "call me" "text me please". Usually, problema ang meaning nun. But I don't mind, as long as they need me andun ako. 

12. I have a very strong personality, always balck and white ang actions ko on things. But pagdating sa kids, iba... I worry and over think a lot. Paranoid na kung paranoid, pero sa isang pagkakamali, pwede mawala ang precious life. Yes, we can't cover all bases but process of eliminations dba? if medyo delikado, wag na gawin. Better to over react, kesa magsisi sa huli. I'm sorry but I get really pissed off when some parents say "naku ok lang yan, wag masyado sensitive sa bata" tapos pag may nangyari blaming game or isisi sa Lord. Yes, accidents happen a LOT pero yung pag iingat sa bata ay endless. 

13. Lastly, hindi porke hindi kami ang mommy. we love them less than the standards of a mom. I love those kids with all my heart kahit alam ko hindi ako ang mom, hindi ako ang katabi nila when they blow the candles sa birthday cake nila, When they go up sa stage to receive their school awards. When they walk down the aisle. When I grow old, hindi sila ang mag aalaga sakin because busy sila sa parents nila. Alam ko yun lahat. But I'm more than happy na they call me when they have problems, pag may masakit sa kanila, pag nahulog sila sa swing and they will reach out to me agad, pag nakabangga sila and we will camp sa police station at christmas eve, pag nahihilo sila sa ferry ride and they need comfort. As long as they need me, whether it's good or bad times. 

I salute all kind of moms! single, stay at home, working moms! all kind of moms! But please don't judge or make comments about ladies like me na hindi mommy na "you don't know how we feel because we're the mommies!" because we do. I do. And it's more painful because you don't have the right to feel that way but you do.

Belated Happy Mother's Day  to all Mommies, Mommies to be and Pseudo Mommies! :)